my thoughts on politics.

It's possible that no one will ever read this, and I'm okay with that. I just have to get all these thoughts out of my head. Every election I feel these things, and it's time I put them into words.

I truly dislike politics. I know a lot of Christians who would try to shame me for my apathy and uninvolvement, but as much as I attempt to muster up some enthusiasm for the candidates and issues, I cannot. People tell me it's my God-given duty to use the freedom I have in this great country and take a stand for the Lord - via the ballot, of course. But I will not.

It's not that I am politically uninformed or ignorant. I researched Amendment 26 as much as, if not a great deal more than, most people who voted today. I read articles and watched videos from both sides. I'm intelligent enough to take that information and discern what is true and what is not.

It's not that I have no opinion, either. I do, and I'll happily share it with you over a cup of coffee, in person, face to face - although I must admit, there are plenty of other things I'd rather talk to you about, like God's word, or Haiti, or downtown Jackson, or poetry. But when I speak my mind (on any issue), I want there to be no mistaking why I believe what I do. I want there to be zero room for anyone to take my words and change their intention. I want you to understand my heart.

That's the problem with politics. Politics isn't about the heart. It's about writing things down in black ink on white paper, for all the world to read and debate and dissect and amend and interpret. But it doesn't matter how many "victories" Christians in politics may have, they will never be able to change hearts.

All throughout God's word, we read about God's love of justice. We serve a just God. He has a heart full of compassion for the hopeless and helpless, for those who cannot speak or stand up for themselves - the oppressed, the widow, the orphan, the fatherless. We as Christians are called to be part of God's redemptive work by advocating on their behalf.

For this reason, it would be foolish to say that Christ-followers shouldn't be involved in politics, ever. God can certainly use Christians in the realm of politics to accomplish things for His kingdom. To me, however, it's just so delicate. We must speak truth in love, we must be careful not to let political issues divide us, we must constantly and very consciously strive to seek His will in all things and not lean on our own understanding.

Above all, we must recognize that no amount of good legislation or godly leadership can change the real issues. The real issues stem from hearts that need Jesus. Let us speak as passionately about the day of His return as we do about election day. Let us not lift up the names of candidates, but the name of our King, Jesus. In Him we trust, right?

"His dominion is an everlasting dominion that will not pass away, and his kingdom is one that will never be destroyed." - Daniel 7:14

have you ever looked at yourself in the mirror, and seen the person you truly are, deep down inside?

i did. and it's pretty scary.

God, help me.

letting go.

sometimes the only thing left to do is just move on. this is hard to do, when we're talking about relationships that once were a significant part of your life.

i have been remembering lately that very few people will stay in my life for always. most are just for a season. this is difficult for me to understand, and even more challenging to accept.

i need to open my hands a bit more. let things be given and taken as they will, and quit clinging so tightly when it's their time to go. i can't fight for them all. and at times it's braver to say goodbye.

help me be brave right now.

te amo de pablo neruda

Te amo,

te amo de una manera inexplicable,

de una forma inconfesable,

de un modo contradictorio.

Te amo

con mis estados de ánimo que son muchos,

y cambian de humor continuamente.

por lo que ya sabes,

el tiempo, la vida, la muerte.

Te amo...

con el mundo que no entiende,

con la gente que no comprende,

con la ambivalencia de mi alma,

con la incoherencia de mis actos,

con la fatalidad del destino,

con la conspiración del deseo,

con la ambigüedad de los hechos.

Aún cuando te digo que no te amo, te amo,

hasta cuando te engaño, no te engaño,

en el fondo, llevo a cabo un plan,

para amarte mejor.

Te amo...

sin reflexionar, inconscientemente,

irresponsablemente, espontáneamente,

involuntariamente, por instinto,

por impulso, irracionalmente.

En efecto no tengo argumentos lógicos,

ni siquiera improvisados

para fundamentar este amor que siento por ti,

que surgió misteriosamente de la nada,

que no ha resuelto mágicamente nada,

y que milagrosamente, de a poco, con poco y nada

ha mejorado lo peor de mí.

Te amo,

te amo con un cuerpo que no piensa,

con un corazón que no razona,

con una cabeza que no coordina.

Te amo

incomprensiblemente,

sin preguntarme por qué te amo,

sin importarme por qué te amo,

sin cuestionarme por qué te amo.

Te amo

sencillamente porque te amo,

yo mismo no sé por qué te amo.

love poem #1

when the night falls soft and silent

when the world has gone to sleep

here I sit awaiting words

that you will gently speak to me

speak to me of depth and beauty

of love and trust and human hearts

how we turn so very quickly

how we swiftly fall apart

speak to me of restoration

of the work your hands can do

of the sweetness of salvation

of the rest I find in you

tell me how you formed the mountains

how you put the stars in place

how you breathe your life and meaning

into this lonely human race

here I sit in awe and wonder

hanging on your every word

with each beat my heart grows fonder

my only wish – to love you more

wait.

"Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him..." - Psalm 37:7

"Lord, I wait for you; You will answer, Lord my God." - Psalm 38:15

In the midst of confusing circumstances, this is our best possible response. To be still and wait. So often we lose heart and find ourselves despairing. Or we become impatient and we try to fix things in our own way. Instead we must quiet our hearts and minds, and wait. The answers will come in His time, but we will not see them if we are frantically searching for man-made solutions.

Help us to be still and wait. We need you now more than ever.

fix you.

when you try your best but you don't succeed

when you get what you want but not what you need

when you feel so tired but you can't sleep

stuck in reverse

when the tears come streaming down your face

when you lose something you can't replace

when you love someone but it goes to waste

could it be worse

lights will guide you home

and ignite your bones

and i will try....to fix you

high up above or down below

when you're too in love to let it go

but if you never try, you'll never know

just what you're worth

lights will guide you home

and ignite your bones

and i will try...to fix you

sometimes life is so beautiful and i find myself so filled with joy i feel as if i will absolutely burst. today is one of those times.

i am so blessed in a million billion ways. mostly in the form of the lovely people i have been fortunate to know and love and have love me back. tonight just thinking about them brings a smile to my face.

that's all i have to say.

the dandelion song.

the other day I picked a dandelion

and on it wished you’d speak to me

and honestly, we both know I’d be lying

if I said things were how they used to be

sometimes things change, and honey, people too

although I fear I never was

the person you imagined that you knew

but it’s okay, it’s okay because

oh time and time and time will tell

how this crazy story ends

i wish, I wish, I wish, I wish you well

and oh, how I wish we were still friends

i’m not sure how many apologies

you needed to decide I cared

but I refuse to get down on my knees

while you disinterestingly stare

i said my piece and now I must be going

along my merry little way

the distance between us just keeps on growing

maybe our paths will meet again some day

oh time and time and time will tell

how this crazy story ends

i wish, I wish, I wish, I wish you well

and oh, how I wish we were still friends

jackson, mississippi.

they have a lot of things to say about you

they say you’re dangerous, and dirty

but deep inside I know I’ve found the truth

oh, there’s just no place like my city

the sun it shines upon your broken glass

filling your sidewalks all with diamonds

then nighttime comes, a perfect kind of peace

in midst of engines’ roars and sirens

you’re beautiful, oh, beautiful

you’re always home to me

you’re beautiful, so beautiful

my Jackson, Mississippi

i have been around this whole big world

and i have seen a lot of places

no matter where I find myself, I’ve found

i cannot forget your faces

your unassuming manner stole my heart

your quiet boisterous disregard

your sunsets falling over railroad tracks

your streets are lovely

your streets are ours

you’re beautiful, oh, beautiful

you’re always home to me

you’re beautiful, so beautiful

my Jackson, Mississippi

a lifetime of memories flood my mind

when they speak your name

there’s nowhere else in the universe

that could make me feel the same

I know I'm 22....

...but I miss my Mommy.

That is all.

So no more messing around. Determination. Let's do this. Italian, drums, running, reading the word....no more complacency. Growth.

This whole Mexico thing has been really good for me. Thank you so much, God, for letting me be here. Thank you for the opportunity you're giving me to grow, even when that means facing my own shortcomings, things that I don't always want to see in myself. Thank you for your patience with me. Thank you for using the people around me here to teach me, to inspire me, to encourage me, and to bless me so immensely. Guide me and show me the things you want me to pursue while I'm here. Help me to be faithful and do all for your glory, with all that I am. Fill me with love and passion and enthusiasm and joy that is contagious. And help me to overflow with your word of life....help me to use what you've given me to bless others. Help me to focus on you. Forgive me for the times I've lost sight and have become discouraged. Thank you that you are always with me. You are the best. Seriously. And every day I'm more amazed at how incredibly creative you are...how did you come up with all of this, God? You are awesome. I'm hoping that some of that rubs off on me ;) I love you, love you, love you!!!

Quiero enamorarme mas de ti, quiero enamorarme mas de ti....